The wrong accessories

Carter update: we are still working on getting him rehomed, and it looks like we might have a plan that will keep him in his same area. I sure hope so, since dogs with Addison's disease can die from stress, and traveling across the country could be stressful.

OK, enough serious stuff for a bit. I can't stay serious very long.

It was pointed out to me by Mary that I was not properly accessorized to be walking my neighborhood in my fleece jammies. I gave it some thought, and she is absolutely correct.

First of all, I had on the jammie top and a jacket, too. Wrong. All wrong. I was supposed to wear a belly shirt, with much skin exposed. Muffin top gets bonus points.

The pants, of course, should have been hanging around my hip bones. I will let you know if I find them. (The hip bones, not the pants.) Having them hang so low that it's a good thing I shave gets bonus points - or are there more points if I don't shave and should? Extra bonus points for the pants being 6 inches too long and I walk all over them until they are filthy and ripped to shreds.

I had on my waterproof Steve Madden shoes and Christmas socks. (hey, the ground has been like a sponge here lately!) All wrong. I should have been wearing stiletto heels. Bonus points: shuffling my feet like a inmate, wearing plastic shower sandals. In the snow.

The jammies were a solid color. Totally wrong! They should at least be plaid or neon striped. Bonus points: my boyfriend's sleep pants. Twelve sizes too big. Or maybe Hello Kitty?

My hair was combed, I had on makeup, and I wasn't showing any cleaveage, front or back. I wasn't even chewing gum with my mouth open. I wasn't at the store buying cigarettes or alcohol. I don't think I even used a bad word.

I tell ya, this fashion stuff overwhelms me some times. I will get right on it!

Back on a serious note: Baby, my almost 6-year-old beagle, is sick. She hasn't been sick since she had bloody diarrhea at about 3 months old and I learned not to sleep with a puppy with that condition because they leak. This time, I don't know yet what is wrong. She goes in to the vet tomorrow morning. She has been a bit listless, her tail has been down, and now she screams when she tries to squat to pee. I gave her an anti-inflammatory which helped a bit. She was able to pee a little with just a screech. My guess is not a UTI, but maybe impacted anal glands or a rear end injury that happened when I wasn't home? Honestly, the symptoms were almost invisible until after I called the vet and made the appointment for tomorrow. Then she got much worse.

Keep in mind, I can't separate the dogs. Molly has to go with me or she gets seriously stressed. That means Valium for her first, and we will have to go inside the building. Molly had seizures in there before, and has had to be treated outside since, year around. Baby will need to go in, so Molly will have to go in. The last 3 months for Molly's shot, the vet tech has taken Molly inside for quick visits, and she has been OK (after her shot). My hands will be full, with one dog who can't squat and one who is goofy on Valium and will possibly have a seizure. Molly is also due for her shot. The roads will be very icy in the morning.

OK, I am through again being serious. I am going to go practice accessorizing for my next impromptu walk through the neighborhood in my jammies. I will update tomorrow on Baby. Instead of selling my old house, I might as well just sign it over to my vet.